Poor impulse control is the cause of most human suffering

Poor impulse control is the cause of most human suffering.

Even if we eliminated all evil from the world, we would still have a lot of pointless suffering because most harm is self-inflicted.

Not intentionally self-inflicted. But caused by a lack of mindfulness. Most people operate all day long on a very simple set of interlocking mental programs formed in childhood. They don’t reason, decide, or adapt; they just act, usually on instinct and as a repetition of what they did before, even if it didn’t work last time.

They lack a mindful focus on their lives and a process of self-reflection that enables cyclic and incremental growth of their programming. They lack an intentional OODA loop and self-correction mechanism.

(The OODA loop is a decision-making process cycle of observing, orienting, deciding, and acting.)

Even when they do self-reflect, it is usually when they are in pain, so it is chaotic and frequently devolves into rumination, which discourages them and makes them feel stuck rather than leading to new insights or growth.

To overcome these mental and emotional traps, we must implement a system for mindfully examining our lives.

A system requires certain components to be successful:

• Timeline or schedule
• Standard of measurements
• Repeatable steps

A timeline

The system needs to be run regularly, preferably on a schedule. The faster you can cycle the system, the faster the learning process.

If you don’t plan to run your system, it’s not going to happen.

Standard of measurements

How can you compare two things to identify which was a better choice if you have no objective standard of measurements? This is why a lot of people end up focusing on money; it’s an easy measurement. You’ll know if you made more this month than last month. Easy.

But it’s a lot harder to measure joy, improved health, better relationships, etc. These things require creativity to measure. You also need to know what “better” means in each of these cases. Not easy.

Repeatable steps

Once you build your system, you want to run it for months or even years without having to change it. Squeeze all the value from the system you have rather than paying the price for constantly changing systems. This allows you to focus on the lessons the system teaches you rather than on system design.

You also need the system to be as clear as possible. Write down the steps—ALL the steps—and miss nothing. It should be possible for someone to read your notes and copy your system without further explanation. Until you document your system, it is not a real system.

Where to start

Building your own system from scratch is a long and time-consuming process. Most people copy or are taught a system by someone else and then maybe modify it for their needs.

Hiring a coach is the short cut that will get you a decade ahead of everyone else. Great coaches have systems that will work for you and have the experience of customizing their systems for all kinds of clients. Getting professional help to accelerate your life is elite behavior.

Conclusion

If you want to correct unhealthy impulsive behavior, you need a simple system that does it incrementally and replaces bad habits with good habits, and you probably need help to get there quickly.