A big part of the problem is this: Many women enter marriage already deeply...

A big part of the problem is this:

Many women enter marriage already deeply unsatisfied, with themselves, their choices, and the direction of their lives. They think marriage will fix that. When it doesn’t, they think, “Maybe if I have kids, that will fix me.” But it doesn’t work either.

Yes, marriage and children will help you mature. But they do so by revealing where you still need to grow. They don’t do the work for you. They shine a spotlight on your insufficiencies, and then ask you to act.

Most single women today are miserable. There’s a massive Adderall problem among young women in their twenties. They need it just to focus, either to get through mindless corporate work or to compete in high-performance spaces built by and for men. That burns them out. So they use weed to relax at night. Maybe some SSRIs to keep the emotional fog at bay. It’s a pharmaceutical carousel, and it’s slowly killing them.

They think getting married will fix the deeper pain. But the problem is deeper and older than that. Marriage doesn’t save you. Children don’t save you. They demand more of you. And if you’re already stretched thin, the cracks only widen.

Marriage and children will point out your flaws so clearly you can’t ignore them. But they won’t fix those flaws for you. And in many ways, they make the hard work of healing even harder, because now your energy is split between being a spouse, a parent, and a still-wounded self.

It becomes very tempting, almost inevitable, for some women to blame that pain on the people closest to them. The husband. The kids.

They start to look back on their single life with rose-colored nostalgia. Even though they chose marriage, because they believed it was better than what came before. Even though they chose motherhood, because something inside them knew it was right.

But when you’re deeply unhappy, you become a target for propaganda. Especially the kind that tells you, “None of this is your fault. You just need to walk away.” And without a strong cultural message that promotes truth, maturity, and feminine responsibility… It’s not surprising that many women take the easy way out.

But here’s the hard truth for husbands:

You can’t make your wife grow up. You can’t make her happy. She has to want that for herself. You can’t manage her emotions. That’s her responsibility too.

All you can do is set the boundaries of what you will and will not tolerate in the relationship. And make absolutely sure that you are not part of the problem.